Realness people, happy new years and many blessings to you all. The sun has been blessing this side of Mother Earth with late spring and even early summer like heat. Breaking all kinds of man kept records. I am sure, some time, long ago in Mother Earth's her-story, yes, her-story she has been much warmer and colder. Happy year of the dog to my sisters and brothers of the Chinese people. As for me, these days inside I am feeling luke warm. A bit melancholic and sad about life and many things in general. My body longing to be free. But that is all okay because again I will not allow these feelings to build a nest in my heart and soul. Such feelings are fine. A part of being human just like love and joy. Though subjects are endless, once again I am at a loss for topics to speak on. I am sure it is the melancholic, and sadness keep me choked up and my pen unmoved. I think of melancholic as a sweet drunk sadness. I know I must embrace the feelings whatever they are and roll with them until I am through the dark valley and over the hills. I must always strive to hug the truth and embrace the realness of any moment. Whatever that truth may be. I do not know where this newsletter is going, but I am sure it will be some where real. I am down and sad and intense about a lot of things and this newsletter is late and lonely like my heart. I'll once again balance the darkness with the light and keep stepping growing and glowing. Time to finish this newsletter.
WRITING STUFF
The book club met today. We had a very good reflection on the book "Pillars of the Earth". I must admit I did not finish the book in time for the meeting. So when the group went beyond the point in the book then I had read, I had to bow out of the conversation and listen respectfully. But also as one of the leaders of the book club I stayed in tune with the conversation and asked important questions to keep things flowing. It was a great book and a great read. The next book "The Kite Runner" by Khaled Hosseini I have already started. I also ran my first writing class since the filming of the documentary. It went well. The fellows read their personal essay assignments. I also did a poetry lesson from my mentor Judith Tannenbaum's new poetry lesson book. I had them do a free write, starting with the sentence fragment " I hear voices when..." The writing session went well. I closed the class with my poetry shot gun session. Which means I call on people to read poetry back to back, one after the other without pause. Hopefully creating and fusing a jazz like flow, freedom and unity to the entire session. PRISON DAY Back on lockdown and the gun-tower read a memo stating the some kind of metal turned up missing in the main kitchen. Which may or may not be true. I remember when I was at Pleasent Valley State Prison, there was a chain-linked fence around the work out area. In this one spot on the fence one or two links were missing. We were locked down that summer for a couple of week based on the missing fence links. The first year I understood, but the second, third and fourth year being locked down for couple of weeks each summer because of those same missing fence links became an absurd game. Anyways out of a population of 1000 on this yard a little more than 20 prisoners work in the main kitchen. There are metal detectors and the warders strip search and cavity search each prisoner everyday in and out of the main kitchen. I am in my lockdown mode and I have begun to draw some butterfly cards although I am not much of a drawer. I also have plenty to read and ponder. There is always my writing. I am hopeful this lockdown will last only a minute. I rose up at 4:00 am today about an hour earlier than usual. I did my crunches sit-ups and leg-lifts. i washed up for the morning, and then did my stretching. I'll do another session of stomach work later. Breakfast came some hardball cooked pancakes, cold and brittle like dried up mud cakes. My neighbor Rick tells the warder to keep the tray. The syrup was chilly too. The milk was cut with water and makes me wonder was there any milk in that liquid purporting to be from a cow. Today lunch was served unwrapped with the breakfast. Some kind of ready made exposed sandwich. No way of knowing where the sandwich had been or where it came from. The same thing goes for the morbid looking cookie put on the breakfast tray for lunch. There was an apple on the tray for our fruit allotment only the meat of the apple is rotten, brown and soft inside. Great apples for dogs or pigs. Even "Lucky" and "Pozzo" from "Waiting for Godot" would have turn their nose and back on such ghastly fixins. i have started my butterfly drawings. It appears the lockdown will be short and that is cool because I am nearly out of real coffee.
BIRD STUFF
Black birds, seagulls and pigeons are around. The pigeons are doing spring things. The male pigeons chasing the female around baying for her attention. On the big yard a pair of swans, so I believe the swans in the area have paired off already. Black birds are paired off too and putting space between themselves and other black birds. Seagulls are still hanging out unpaired and eating what comes their way or anything they can find. Crows are still coming around too. I cannot tell if the crows or seagulls are paired up. I know seagulls will nest on some coast or on some island in the sea. Some seagull island or cliffs along the sea. The sunny days have left and some cold spring rains and some at times heavy snow storms have arrived. It is all good. 'Sara' has some thing wrong with her leaves. She is blistering with little dry spots on her leaves that grow bigger and causes the leaf to dry and curl up brown and die. Not the stems just the leaves. Like she has sores or measles or wing-worms. I don't know what to do - only to keep talking to her and giving her water and sunshine when the is out. I asked around and some folks said perhaps I gave her to much water. I have been watering her the same as always. Some folks says it's not enough sun. 'Sara' strives on indirect sunlight. Other folks said looks like someone pinched the leaves or someone sprayed some chemical on her just to be mean. Because people see how much I care for the plant. No matter what I'll keep her talking to her and loving her. Too cold to sit 'Sara' outside the art room with me. Whenever the sun comes back out she will sit outside with me for hours. I will continue to talk to 'Sara' and listen to her and care for her and watch her as I do rainbows, rain storms, sunsets and sunrises, full moons and full dreams. Today I gave 'Sara' a paper towel bath. If it is raining a warm rain tomorrow I'll put her out in the rain and let the sky and Mother Earth heal her. STAY REAL SECTION It happened, the longer film documentary has taken place, and this time my people from Sweden were allowed inside New Folsom Prison. They collected many hours of film. The original plan was to do a longer documentary on me after the success of the award winning short film "Three poems by Spoon Jackson". But the filming could not have happened if the focus was on one individual. The State Prison system said no. The focus must be all of arts-in-correction programs. The filming did happen with the film crew from Sweden. I think it turned out to be cool and splendid and will show some depth and some slices of realness not seen before in prison. If one was to compare this film documentary to the one done here by Lisa Ling/Oprah Winfrey back in 2005, you will see how limited, one-sided and stereo typical their documentary was. Unfortunately they focused on one or two negative and sometimes phony aspects of prison. The Swedish documentary touched some negative realness stuff too but balanced it positive, growthful redemptive prisoner generated and created programs. Programs that spread love, forgiveness, peace and realness through the arts. Some of the Lisa Ling/Oprah's film crew covored was outrageous and far from real. They had impostors speak on things that supposedly happens in prison, all the time, but doesn't. Some of the inmates they spoke to were not even housed in the mainline of the prison and never come in contact with mainline prisoners. They never bothered to explain the difference. I look forward to seeing the final cut of this documentary. the film crew is back in Sweden editing all the footage taken. What will come of it will be real, unique and cutting edge. Like when I was involved in "Waiting for Godot" and it all ended there was a big let down inside me. I am experiencing a let down. A let down from being into something so deep, unique, beautiful and uncut. I think people will see themselves and that everyone is human. People will see that we all walk one foot in darkness, one foot in light. And that awareness allows everyone to be real.
CLOSING THOUGHTS
We are one people, one planet and one love expressed in endless ways by each of us! Peace Gang spreading growth, love and brilliance beyond borders - spreading realness and healing. May your spring be as bright as your heart and eyes can see.
One love Spoon
